is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
only you would photoshop your dick
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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