My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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