Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
