sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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