OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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