Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize