Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
