I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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