South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
