About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
you would pick up someone in the library
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
