The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
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after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
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Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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