He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
