grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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