the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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