I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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