based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
This gyro tastes like lonliness
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize