I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
