oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
She bit a glass in half.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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