I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
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Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I have already put on my inside pants.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?