question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
operation have a gay friend backfired
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
