so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I think I just sharted jello shots
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
