absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
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