we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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