It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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