I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
My vagina is officially offended.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
