Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?