I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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