Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize