I want to stick my p in your. b.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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