I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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