so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
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