There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay