oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Alive.
So much puke
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
