It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I need help removing her.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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