Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
a search helicopter?!
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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