she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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