I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
