Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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