i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
