my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
What drink are we having for lunch?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Randomize
