At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize