we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
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