Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
