The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I'm just crazy horny about you
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Randomize
