She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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