I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
