True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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