She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
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