I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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