He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
